My Date with 16-year-old Ashley

“My Date With 16 yr old Ashley”

For my assignment, I went through the steps of imagining myself on a date with my younger cousin Ashley. Ashley is currently 8 years old and she has Autism Spectrum Disorder. People with ASD are usually diagnosed within the first 18 months of their life; this disorder is a physical condition that is very often linked to abnormalities in the biology and chemistry of the brain. ASD most commonly affects an individual’s ability to socially interact with others and communicate verbally or nonverbally.  I have known Ashley since she was born and I actually used to babysit her very often when she was in her baby/toddler stages so I was able to watch her develop into the young, vibrant, but reserved little girl that she is today. Ashley is pretty quiet and she loves to read. She also likes to play board games when we’re together because it doesn’t require her to talk too much if she really doesn’t have to.

 So I imagined that if I were to ask Ashley to spend the day with me in a few years, she would want to do something that wouldn’t require her to venture too much out of her zone. She has trouble being in public areas that have too much noise, because she will put her hands in her ears when the noise becomes unbearable for her. She also dislikes being around people that like to converse with her or ask questions, because she doesn’t like conversations or making eye contact with people she doesn’t know. It makes her feel uncomfortable and gives her a sense of inability to do what she is accustomed to.

My date with 16-year-old Ashley would consist of going to the Gwinnett County Fair, and later on go have a meal at Panera then head to my house for a game of “Jenga”. At the fair, I could already imagine the amount of anxiety and unease this would bring to Ashley’s overall being. This is where we would encounter the key concepts of comfort, crowding, and activity. I already know that no matter the time of day, Ashley does not like large amounts of noise. Being at a fair where there are hundreds of other people actively participating in different events, would be overwhelming for her. That would be where we would reach the concept of crowding. When Ashley is unable to have her own personal space she becomes really upset.  The next key concept I noticed would be an issue was comfort. The environment of the fair was loud and busy, but it still had lots of things that would bring Ashley joy. So during this part of the date, we come across the concepts of sensory stimulation and sociality. The lights from the different booths would also be something she would love to look at and gaze at for long periods of time that would contribute to sensory stimulation. The rides, especially the Ferris wheel, would be something that would make her extremely happy because it allows her to enjoy it individually.  Because of her dislike of sociality, she would be uncomfortable enjoying either of these things with people interrupting her view as well as her silence. She would also dislike people having to walk near her or even with waiting in line for the ride because it would be too much for her spatial needs. All the things going on around her would be where the high levels of activity would affect her behavior.

When sitting at Panera I imagined the ease of spirit and relief that she would feel being in a much quieter environment being able to head back to her norm of being isolated with familiar people, such as myself.  So I think adaptability, control, and privacy would be concepts that would be present during the remainder of the date. Panera doesn’t have your usual servers/waitresses like many other restaurants so it would allow her to remain calm and quiet like she is used to. I would also imagine that by this time she would be a lot more acquainted with electronic devices and be able to skip the line by ordering her food using a mobile application. This would be where the concept of adaptability would be in use. I also see control of her environment contributing to a pleasant experience too. We would be able to pick up our food, find our own seats, probably outdoors so she would be able to watch the birds, and not be pressed for time.

Lastly, when thinking of heading to my house for some time alone, I know that the concept of privacy would take over. Jenga is a game that she loves to play (she plays a simpler version called “Kerplunk” now), its one of the only times where she will completely feel free to express her excitement. And I feel that the access that she will have to know where she is, whom she’s with, and why contributes to her ease and enjoyment.

Overall, I know she would cherish every moment we would have together as she always does. She would ask plenty of questions and I know I would hear her favorite phrase “Why do we have to do this?” multiple times. I look forward to making this a reality in the future and hope to be able to explain to her all of these concepts and maybe even be able to answer her favorite question once or twice.

--G. Badio