Hillary Ackerman

My Date with Gary :)

Because I was not able to go on a date with an actual disabled person, I had to imagine what it would be like. At the end of my favorite movie, ‘Remember the Titans’, the star football player gets into a car accident and is paralyzed from the waist down and has to spend the rest of his life in a wheelchair. I have used Gary as my imaginary disabled date.The way I looked at it, our date needed to be super fun and enjoyable for Gary.  I decided to really think about his interests and pick places where he would have the best time.

Gary and I went to an intramural flag football game!! Gary may not be able to play the sport he once loved so much, but he definitely still enjoys watching it. He can still use his arms, so during halftime we got to go out onto the field and throw the ball around with some friends! We were all laughing and joking and we all had a great time doing this!

When it was time to eat, I decided that it would be best to eat at my apartment. That way it would be a quiet environment, I could cook whatever he wanted, and he would feel comfortable with the surroundings. We ended up having turkey sandwiches, Scooby-Doo fruit snacks, and chips. We made a little picnic out on my porch because the weather was absolutely beautiful.

ACCESSIBLILTY: When we got to the fields, it was very easy to park because the facility offers four handicap spaces right in the front of the building. A ramp is available to get onto the fields which made it super easy for Gary in his wheelchair. The fields do not have doors, so we didn’t have to think about having to fit his wheelchair through a door. The grass was a little bit tricky because the grass is very uneven, but with my help we managed to get to the flat area in no time at all! When we got to my apartment, it was a breeze because it is on the first floor so it wasn’t challenging at all for Gary to get inside. No stairs or elevators needed! My kitchen table was a slight problem because it is very high off the ground, so Gary could not reach. This is when we had the great idea to make the picnic on the porch! Other than that, the date was very accessible for Gary’s wheelchair.

COMFORT: I think that the date was pretty comfortable for both of us. At the game, Gary didn’t have to worry about being a sore-thumb in his wheelchair because there weren’t really any obstacles for him to overcome. Also, since we were around our friends, it made it really easy to forget about anything that would normally be uncomfortable had we been by ourselves.

PRIVACY: Obviously, during the football game there wasn’t much privacy because we were at a public event. Once we got back to my house though, we had all the privacy we wanted. I had asked my roommates to find something to occupy their time with for a couple hours while I had Gary over. We were able to talk to each other and really get to know each other without any distractions. 

SPACIOUSITY/CROWDING: The whole date was actual very spacious. On the football field, Gary was able to wheel around wherever he pleased. When we got back to my house, it obviously was much smaller of a space but it still wasn’t that hard for him to move around.

SOCIALITY: I think that our date had just right balance when it came to a social aspect. At the football game, we got to be around people and see how each other interacted with friends. There were also people working the games that we got to talk to. At the house, it was just us so we got to talk on a more intimate level.

MEANING: This date meant a lot. It really challenged me to think about another person’s needs more than my own. Seeing how Gary has to adapt to the world around him, made me realize how easy most people have it and the things they take for granted in their everyday lives. I think that for our next date I will take him out to a more public place, such as the aquarium, but I will just do my research first and make sure that it will be accessible and comfortable for Gary. J